Blame the hormones, of course. They are multiplying by the second. One minute you’re sobbing over a TV commercial and the next, you’ll be screaming at your hubby because… Heck, who cares why? He deserved it, didn’t he?
The reassuring news is that once you pop that baby out, your hormones will regulate themselves after a few months and you’ll be your old self once again ( hello there!).
Until then, embrace the “new you” and enjoy her for as long as you can. After all, having a split personality sure does keep things fresh with one’s friends and family! If you can’t figure out which pregnancy personality you are, we’ve rounded up the top 12 for you.
She has always been a certified control freak and wants everything done her way. Now that she’s preggers, her eccentric behaviour hasn’t just gone up a notch, it’s blown out of proportion. She wants to have the perfect pregnancy. She has an elaborate birth announcement planned and probably carries a list of “brain foods” she must eat every day to make sure she gives birth to the next Einstein. Her birth plan is six pages long and don’t worry about figuring out what to buy for her baby shower ― she will send you a link to her online gift registry.
MOST LIKELY TO SAY… “Our flat is on the market as we’re looking to find one that’s near good Primary and Secondary schools.”
LEAST LIKELY TO SAY… “Gosh, I haven’t even thought about baby names.”
She’s with child, which means the entire world has to revolve around her right now. While every mum deserves care and attention during this delicate time, this woman takes it to a whole new level. Her baby bump isn’t showing yet, but how dare you not give up your seat for her on the bus. If she’s craving satay bee hoon at 11pm from her favourite stall which is 45 minutes away, the hubs has to leave RIGHT.THIS. MINUTE and get it for her. And everyone stop talking so loudly, it’s not good for the baby!
MOST LIKELY TO SAY… “Why haven’t my friends called to check up on me today? I told them yesterday that the morning sickness was bad. Don’t they care about me?”
LEAST LIKELY TO SAY… “It’s just part of pregnancy, I’ll get over it.”
Even the most laidback ladies can emerge raging over the most trivial of matters.
The Short Fuse
She has no patience, no tact and basically no time to think about anyone but herself these days. Even the most laidback ladies can emerge raging over the most trivial of matters and it’s not just because of the hormones. Fatigue, weight gain, plus aches and pains, can take a toll on anyone’s emotional state. It’s like your regular PMS, but it comes more frequently and in shorter bouts. So, she’s snapping at the person who jumped queue in the line for the bus. She tells her boss exactly what she thinks of him and, generally, just scaring the bejesus out of everyone around her.
MOST LIKELY TO SAY… “Your breathing annoys me, get out of the room.”
LEAST LIKELY TO SAY… “I’m sorry, did I hurt your feelings?”
She refuses to acknowledge that pregnancy is going to change her life in anyway. Women have been giving birth for centuries, so what’s with the fuss? No, she will not read What to Expect When You’re Expecting. No, she will not draw up a birth plan (“Women have been giving birth in trees and taxis, the body knows what to do”). Yes, she will have that one glass of wine her gynae said she could in her third trimester. Yes, she will eat nuts and one more serving of sashimi, please!
MOST LIKELY TO SAY… “Who’s up for kick boxing?”
LEAST LIKELY TO SAY… “Should I make a plaster cast out of my bump?”
Ever since the pregnancy stick showed a positive sign, this woman’s only goal in life is to shop until she pops. Having a baby is a great excuse to buy stuff, because they need a lot of everything, don’t they? She’s pretty sure baby will only sleep if swaddled in that $80 muslin wrap. Ooh, a heartbeat monitor that will let you listen to your unborn child’s heartbeat any time you want ― take my money right now! By the way, which way to Baby Dior and Gucci Kids?
MOST LIKELY TO SAY… “I’ll take them in all four different colours, just to be safe.”
LEAST LIKELY TO SAY… “I’m so glad I managed to get some hand-me-downs and free second-hand stuff for my baby. They outgrow things so quickly.”
It’s a drug-free, home water-birth or nothing for this Earth mama. She wants to be as close to nature and everything natural as possible since it’s the best for her and her bub. She’s already booked her doula, listens to the hypnobirthing CDs every day and has stocked her nursery with washable nappies. She’s also figuring out how to start her own urban garden, so she can grow organic veggies and is figuring out on how best to cook and eat her placenta after birth.
MOST LIKELY TO SAY… “I knit my baby booties using wool made with natural dye.”
LEAST LIKELY TO SAY… “Over-the-counter nappy rash creams are totally fine, why bother to make your own?”
Meet six more pregnancy personalities…next!
The complaints and whining never end with this woman, who has been aptly named Little Miss Miserable by her loved ones. Sure, pregnancy is hard, thanks to morning sickness, oedema, insomnia and heartburn. We feel you but sometimes, all that moaning and groaning spills over to other aspects of your life, too (such as “My husband doesn’t get me anymore!” or “My boss has become very demanding!”). There are upsides to having a baby, surely?
MOST LIKELY TO SAY… “Why do these bad things only happen to me?”
LEAST LIKELY TO SAY… “I’m so grateful for what I’ve got, I should do something nice for the people who’ve been helping me during this pregnancy.”
The Pregnancy Brain
The one alter ego every woman will meet at some point during her pregnancy. Your brain is being overloaded with thoughts about your baby, fears about the upcoming birth and doubts about how you’re going to cope with motherhood. It’s no wonder you became such a scatterbrain. You will find your car keys in the freezer, show up for brunch on the wrong day and wash your face twice because you can’t remember doing it the first time.
MOST LIKELY TO SAY… “Can you take a sniff and tell me if I’m wearing deodorant, I can’t recall putting on any this morning.”
LEAST LIKELY TO SAY… “Don’t worry, I won’t forget it.”
Your brain is being overloaded with thoughts about your baby, fears about the upcoming birth and doubts about how you’re going to cope with motherhood.
She’s so blessed to be preggers. Maybe she had a hard time conceiving . Maybe she’s had to endure multiple miscarriages. Or maybe she had to invest a lot of time, money and emotions into assisted reproductive technology. Whatever the case, this lady is so happy she’s knocked up, she’s a walking, talking ball of sunshine.
MOST LIKELY TO SAY… “Do you know what another awesome thing about being pregnant is?”
LEAST LIKELY TO SAY… “I’m so sick and tired of being pregnant.”
The Info Seeker
Dr Google is her BFF. She feels more confident when armed with as much info as possible about her delicate condition. After all, her favourite search engine has answers for even the smallest sensation and every pregnancy question that pops into her head. Her nightstand towers with pregnancy and parenting books that have been earmarked and emphasised with a highlighter pen. She has bookmarked WebMD, BabyCenter and every trustworthy parenting site she knows in her mobile phone. And her gynaecologist is on speed dial, just in case she needs an answer ASAP for every pressing pregnancy question.
MOST LIKELY TO SAY… “Do you know what WebMD says about…?”
LEAST LIKELY TO SAY… “I’m afraid I don’t have the answer to that.”
The Forever Hungry One
She doesn’t believe you when you tell her she’s not supposed to eat for two, and only supposed to be increasing her calorie intake by 300 every day only during her second and third trimester. Baby is growing constantly, so it needs all the nutrition it can get, she reasons. And stop hiding her favourite snacks, otherwise things are going to get really ugly. What does she want? Gula melaka sago pudding with a side of goreng pisang. When does she want it? Now!
MOST LIKELY TO SAY… “Are you going to finish that?”
LEAST LIKELY TO SAY… “Of course you can have the last chicken wing.”
The Level-Headed One
Just when you were about to declare every pregnant woman out there a dingbat, we finally locate a relatively sane alter ego. Level-headed Lucy doesn’t seem to have been hijacked by those crazy pregnancy hormones like her girlfriends. Sure, you might catch glimpses of Little Miss Miserable or Short Fuse Sally now and again, but she’s generally in good spirits and operates like she did B.P. (before pregnancy). So level is she, she might even be a sounding board or the voice of reason for her eccentric pregnant friends.
MOST LIKELY TO SAY… “Please don’t let pregnancy drive you to do something that crazy.”
LEAST LIKELY TO SAY… “I feel like the whole world is against me.”
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